September 11 – Finding Unity 20 Years Later
September 11 Haiku | © 2021 Christopher Sanford
It was 20 years ago that the world collectively held its breath as terror struck the United States. What was to come? Who survived? Who didn’t? Are we going to war? Who could do something so horrific?
I was a couple months shy of eight years old when we watched two Boeing 767s crash into the World Trade Center’s Twin Towers – another Boeing into the Pentagon, yet another sacrificed in a field. That day, we saw the absolute worst of humanity – followed by some of the absolute best.
I don’t have some personal story to tell about how I can remember that day so clearly. It’s fuzzy in my mind. I remember the news playing nonstop. I could sense the shift in my household – my parents silently wondering if it was safe to take their children to school with fear, anxiety, pain, confusion, and anger swirling about. I didn’t know what it was, but I knew something was not right. Holly Easttom, a professor of mine at OBU, shared the following poem and images on September 11, 2020 that beautifully, and painfully, reminds us of the desperation experienced on 9/11.
Choosing to Fall by Holly Easttom
In this image, you are grainy
at first, indistinguishable from casual debris
also making its final exit.
Glass from the window,
twisted spires of support beams
an office chair
then you.
Your body directed downward,
shot to the earth
a deliberate arrow,
destination hurtling to you
rising to meet you like a great bird in flight.
Your hair is short and dark;
skin olive in the sun.
One moment the wind details your collar,
the next an orange undershirt
hugging your chest.
Dark leather shoes, toes pointed skyward
as if diving by choice.
The camera has captured you, here,
between two voids
between flames and the street
smoke and September mornings
death and dying.
I want to believe that when you made
the choice that was not a choice,
you breathed in
the scent of your morning coffee,
crisp white cotton of your daughter’s communion
dress, the city in fall
and you leapt into a perfect morning sky
to drop
leaving nothing but
A collective trauma
Image by David Mark from Pixabay
The world watched a city burn – planes falling from the sky – people falling from the sky. After each attack that morning, the question quickly became “What do we do now?”. September 12, 2001 is remembered by many as a day that the United States stood more unified than ever, and rightfully so. After sharing an astronomical collective trauma, the United States put on its boots and went to work, to rebuild, to begin healing. I hear people say that they would love to see America return to September 12, 2001. I agree with the sentiment here. I would love to see our nation more unified, but I would never ask to return to September 12th.
September 12, 2001 is a day filled with agony and mourning for those who lost the people they loved most. September 12th is filled with phone calls confirming a parent’s worst fear. September 12th is filled with soldiers fearing that they will be called to make the ultimate sacrifice for this nation. I love the unity of this day, but I could never ask someone to relive those moments. Last year, I read Garrett Graff’s The Only Plane in the Sky: An Oral History of 9/11 where he says, “The significance of the date of September 11th, 9/11, was seared into the nation's collective memory, altering the way those affected looked at the calendar and even clocks.” I would highly recommend this book, especially the audio version, to anyone who wants to better understand how 9/11 impacted individuals on every level.
Asking someone to return to 2001 is asking them to step into their most painful moment. It’s easy for me to look at September 12th as a day where humanity thrived because I was too young in 2001 to understand the nation’s grief – a grief that lives today. To me, September 11, 2021 looks a lot like September 11, 2001. The country is in pain – leaving Afghanistan after 20 years of military occupation. We just recently lost 13 members of our military to a suicide attack in Afghanistan. The nation continues to groan in pain from a battle that started 20 years ago, with a history beyond that. However, September 12, 2021 lacks any resemblance of the unity displayed on September 12, 2001. We carry the pain, but much of the nation has quit asking “How can we stand together?”. Instead of asking how we can help rebuild the nation in 2021, we continually point fingers at our opposition, this time within our own population. Instead of coming together to fix our issues, we accost our neighbor for not believing the same way we do, erasing them from our lives.
Prioritizing relationships
It doesn’t have to be this way. If you’ve talked to me at any time in 2021, I’ve probably mentioned the name Sharon McMahon. You can find her on Instagram (@SharonSaysSo) sharing current events, facts about the U.S. government, and pictures of whales. She often repeats this idea that the United States always accomplishes that which it prioritizes. We prioritize our military, resulting in the United States being a world superpower. We prioritize individual freedoms, giving us a continual struggle between what is right for the individual versus what is right for the nation (i.e., should all wear a mask, or should we have the right to refuse?). We prioritize the preservation of our land, giving us a magnificent collection of National Parks. On September 12, 2001, we prioritized our neighbor, giving us more unity than ever seen. While I would never return to September 12, 2001, I believe we can still prioritize our neighbor, and we need to just as much today as we did then. But how?
Image by David Mark from Pixabay
How could we ever find unity in such a divided nation? Finding unity looks a lot like our recovery from the 9/11 attacks. It means we quit labeling our neighbor as democrat or republican, too liberal or too conservative. Instead, we label our neighbor as a human, in need of community, connection, and hope, just as we all are. Most of us want the same things for this country and ourselves – safety, prosperity, a fair chance, inviting communities, friendships, justice, a thriving economy – the list goes on. The problem is we often have differing views about how to accomplish these things, thus our divisions. Prioritizing unity will also be painful and awkward at times as we muster up the courage to address the ways we have hurt the people around us, but this pain is worth it.
We don’t have to overcomplicate this. First, we must remind ourselves that it’s okay to disagree with someone without cancelling them completely. If this weren’t true, I wouldn’t have a single friend today! I exist with many millennials in this political party void where one of my friends will say I’m way too liberal, while another simultaneously says I’m absurdly conservative. Nevertheless, we can still share a cup of coffee, laugh at a movie, and generally enjoy life together. Coming together as humans doesn’t mean we have to agree on everything politically, it just means we need to agree that our relationships are more important than our viewpoints. There are undoubtedly times where walking away from relationships is the answer as someone has either harmed you or spoken out in ways that cannot be redeemed. However, this doesn’t need to be our first response. Often, if we’re willing to ask someone about their viewpoints without chomping at the bit to share ours in return, we can learn a lot about our friends. They’re often hurting just as much as we are. They’re often hoping for the same things we are.
We’ve seen division in our nation since its founding. Discord is nothing new. While it’s heightened by social media and the never-ending onslaught of media vying for our clicks and views, we can make some small changes in our lives to better understand and encourage our neighbors. Take some time away from social media or whatever it is in your life that raises your anxiety. Instead of hastily responding to a friend’s Facebook post in anger, invite them to share a meal or glass of wine, and ask them about their views in a way that helps you understand them as a person. Instead of listening to respond in argument, listen to understand the person with whom you’re talking. We can stand in unity as nation only when we’re ready to stand in unity with our neighbor, even the one with different political affiliation. This doesn’t mean forgetting our values and abandoning our principles; it just means prioritizing our relationships. Make your argument on the ballot, not on Facebook, and remind people that you find value in them simply being.
Book recommendations:
The following books contain affiliate links.
The Only Plane in the Sky: An Oral History of 9/11 by Garrett Graff - This book shares individual’s stories from 9/11. The audiobook is especially powerful it’s narrated by a full cast. This is not primarily a political or historical account of the day, instead it emphasizes the impact that it had on individual’s lives. It’s truly incredible.
Talking to Strangers: What We Should Know About the People We Don’t Know by Malcom Gladwell - This book is full of insight and provides some helpful tools for getting to know the people who you don’t know or understand.
Lost Connections: Uncovering the Real Causes of Depression - and the Unexpected Solutions by Johann Hari - Though this book is focused on depression, I think it is a helpful read for understanding the importance of community and relationships.
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